Married life and flying candles

You know, my husband spends a lot of time wondering why in the hell he married me I’m sure. I like to tell him it’s because he knocked me up and if he didn’t marry me my mom would have come after him and if he thinks I’m crazy, well he truly hasn’t seen anything. Tonight I sat at the computer completely cracking up reading a blog and he’s giving me the “what the hell are you laughing at while I’m trying to watch informative gardening youtube videos stink eye” . I am a pro at ignoring said stink eye. Really I’m a pro at ignoring my entire family. I blanked out from the time the boy was born almost 10 yrs ago until last week. I even had child #2 in there somewhere. Anyway so I’m laughing *tears streaming down my face* and he’s giving me the stink eye. Finally he does one of those long suffering sighs and says “what’s so funny?!” Yes, equal parts question and exclamation…remember he’s annoyed. So I start reading him some posts. By the time I’ve got to the end of the second one he’s saying “I couldn’t be married to that girl…her husband, he’s got a lot of patience”.

Me: Um I’m a bit crazy toooooooo. Remember when I threw that candle at your head? That’s was funny stuff!

Hubs: I didn’t find that funny. Also it was 13 yrs ago.

Me: We obviously remember the situation differently. I remember laughing when it bounced off your big head. It was before I blanked out on our entire life.

Hubs: I remember NOT laughing. Blanked out?

Me: We will agree to disagree. Yea, blanked out you know, like I have no idea what we’ve been doing for the past 10 years.

Hubs: You can’t tell me what we’ve been doing for 10 years but you can tell me the plot for every damn book you’ve ever read?

Me: Well yea, the important stuff I remember…….go ahead, ask me something about the sexy parts.

Hubs: No. Go away, I’m reading about using milk as a fungicide on the garden plants.

He’s a fun guy my hubs.

Moral of the story? 13 yrs after throwing a candle at someones head it will still be funny- at least to me. And apparently milk can be used as a fungicide.

Have a great holiday weekend everyone! Hug a soldier…I’m sure there is nothing a big tough Marine wants more then to have a random woman come up to him in a Walmart and give him a hug. Of course when I dream about something like that it usually involves him sweeping his beefy chiseled arm across a rack of $5 tank tops and then taking me on top of the table. I’m nothing if not classy.


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