Reader Author Get Together 2012

I recently had the opportunity to go to the Reader Author Get Together in West Chester Ohio…and I HAD A BLAST! Seriously….I haven’t had that kind of fun in well, since the last convention LOL. If you ever have the chance to go, you need to. This one esp because Lori Foster (planner extraordinaire) goes to great lengths to make it affordable ($50 for the convention) and the hotel is extremely nice ($109 a night). They even throw in meals which I find incredibly generous. I lot of time and people go into this event and I want to formally thank them for the great job they do.

This year I had a fabulous cohort on the drive down and back in the fantabulous Heather McKenna, who can’t take a good picture to save her life. For real, she goes alien face as soon as someone hits the button on the camera. So you won’t see her in a lot of my pictures because even though she thinks Im evil….I’m not that huge of a bitch. Unless she pisses me off, in which case I will post that shit EVERYWHERE. We thought about stopping at a porn store on the way down but sadly the one we found looked like a windowless van – store style, and I really didn’t feel like getting raped so that was a no go. There was a car idling in the parking lot y’all….Ladies night coming soon! Line up to get in those viewing booths ladies! *shudder*

As soon as we got there this was the first thing I did…and yes, this debauchery continued in mass quantities all weekend.

The weekend itself is a whirlwind where I went a bit crazy on the book buying, I acquired some signed books for you crazy people that stalk me (watch for my blogaversary post at the end of the month). And what’s a weekend without a panic attack from the sheer amount of people present? Oh yes I had one of those too. No fear, it didn’t hinder the book buying so no worries LMAO. I met some authors that I have always wanted to meet (JILL SHALVIS!!!! SQUEE) as well as some old friends.

I did have a run in with a author’s husband who was a complete jerkoff. He basically threw a tantrum that we were sitting at HIS table. What? For serious? This isn’t a 5th grade cafeteria, there is no assigned seating asshat. And he kept saying her name like she was Nora Roberts….uuuhhhh no dude, just no. I didn’t know who she was and telling me her name 20 times isn’t going to make me know who she is either. So calm the hell down and go to another table. He kept saying things under his breath until we finally got up and left, just in the knick of time too b/c Hulk Nikki was fighting to get out and I didn’t want to have to pound him down in front of all his wifes friends. Way to be douchey hubs – I won’t be reading your wifes books…EVER.

Here is some photographic proof of me and some pretty terrific people:

Jill Shalvis is so incredibly nice! LOVED HER!

Carly Phillips is AWESOME! I bought and had her sign 3 books for my collection, can’t wait to get to them!

Why do I have a weird “come hither” look? I guess JA makes me feel…..good 🙂

Jules Bennett is so damn cute!

Oh Virna DePaul…I want to be your new bestie!

Jen, fellow blogger – loved meeting her!

Alright now for the fun…I mean completely embarrassing pics. I should preface and say these are mostly while I was drunk…not really, I was totally stone cold sober in these which cracks me up even more. I’m a strange girl, with crazy amazing friends.

A picture of a picture..whatever you get the point. You can’t see it but my hand is on the crotch of that cutout. OOOOOOO just like last year LOL.

Julie A Lindsey, Heather McKenna, Valerie Haight, Rachel and I

So okay….ummmmmm. Heather was planking, I sat on her, we rode the elevator at least up and down 3 times while cackling so loudly the elevator in the other shaft heard us and thought we were stuck. Then a very nice, confused man got on the elevator and calmly stepped over Heather who never did get off the floor. Seriously, if that’s the worst that guy saw while at the hotel he can call it a success.

It’s our “whaaaaaa?” face….

Don’t make me explain what this means. Ok ok..its fellatio for all you people with virgin ears out there. If you don’t know what fellatio means go ahead and Google it. You’re welcome for the spam ware you get after you do that.


Val is a cheap drunk….seriously, one drink and she’s done for the night.

What a amazing weekend! Also – Heather has smelly sandals and I wanted to throw them out the window of my vehicle that was doing 80 towards home. Seriously. SMELLS.  And me telling the world that is to get back at Heather who, while I was in the middle of a panic attack, told me I had won a prize and I jumped up….I had NOT won a prize. She’s just a horrible friend.

Can’t wait till next year!!!!


  1. OMG..I was at the table when she told you that!! LMFAO!! The weekend was soo much fun!! Great to see you again!! <3

    1. It was so much fun! I laughed so hard in that elevator I thought I was gonna pass out. That poor poor man that got on, he had no idea what was happening and he just went with it.

    1. Great meeting you too! Of course we got pics, you can’t not get pics when something like that happens. I wonder if there is video in the elevator and how much Id have to pay to get a copy of it…..

    2. HA! Were you waiting for the elevator? Someone actually came to look for us. They thought our elevator was stuck somewhere.

  2. They were flip flops not sandals. I admit they were stinky. It was well worth it for you jumping up all excited thinking you had won!! BWAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA

    This really was the best weekend. Thanks again for letting me know about it. Even the douchey husband was not going to ruin my good time.

  3. Flip flops have a thing in between the toes..those horrible things did NOT – you can call them sandals or slides..not flip flops 🙂 Regardless, they need to be disposed of in a hazard bag.

  4. HA HA Nope. I will now where those every time I see you. No mention of the “squeaky chair” in the Erin and Carly speed chat?

  5. Wow. Where was I during all this debauchery and fun going on? Next year, I’m not leaving your side, I don’t want to miss anything. 🙂 LOVED meeting you. You’re sweet and adorable, and now that I’ve seen the pictures, a whole bunch of other things too. 🙂

  6. Woot! Thanks for giving those of us who didn’t have a chance to go a peek at the fun, Nikki! Looks and sounds like an amazing time was had by all! Yay!

  7. I still want to pee every time I think of that guy just stepping over Heather like there are always women sprawled across the floor in elevators. I don’t know if I’ve ever laughed that hard. We’ll have to come up with something even better next year!

  8. TRUE friends would have warned me that there was someone out there and I would have got up! LMAO He did have a pleasant accent though

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